PENPALS WITH IRAN!

“Settle down! Settle down- JAMES - stop that. Okay, okay. Everybody take out a pen and paper… we have a very special project planned for today. Today, each one of you is going to write a letter to a pen pal! Does anybody know what a pen pal is? No? - that’s okay. A pen pal is very much like a friend - except instead of living next door to you or going to the same school - they live in an entirely different country!”

“Cooool-”

“Really?-”

“Where?-”

“Can I borrow a pencil?”

“Shhh… settle down. Hey- Roman! Hey-”

“I needed to borrow a pencil.”

“Hurry up then. Does everybody have a pen or pencil? Good. Okay, now I’m going to come around the room and distribute a pen pal to each one of you. Not all of them come from the same country so you should each get somebody very different from everybody else. Also, keep in mind that every one of your pen pals are also in the 2nd grade. They’re all around the very same age as yourselves - here you go, Casey - and be nice and considerate towards their culture - Megan, take this one - because we wouldn’t want to give them a bad impression of America - did you get one?”

“Okay, now for this letter I want you all to just introduce yourselves. Tell your pen pal a little about who you are and that sort of thing… get to know each other… just like you would in real life! If you need any help, just let me know, I’ll be walking around the room to see how you’re doing.”

Casey reads his Pen Pal description:

“ABDUL GHANI
Mashhad, Iran
9 years old
Interests: Sports, Games, Kites, Swimming”

Casey chews on the end of his pencil before writing…

“Hello Abdul! My name is Casey Edwards and I live in Minneapolis, Minnesota! I am also 9 years old and I also really like swimming. We have a swimming pool in my back yard and I love having friends come over and we go swimming and its really great. I wonder what its like to live in another country! But for real I really love America and wouldnt want to leave it for the world! My mom and my grandpa were born here and they say we have lived here for a long time. Do you guys have Blockbuster in Iran because i reeeeally love Blockbuster. Whenevr I want to see a movie I go there and rent one out. I just saw Napoleon Dinamite and thought it was SO FUNNY. You should see it when it comes out in your country. I really hope your having fun Abdul and that you can visit me sometime!

Bye!!!
-Casey”

3 Weeks Later…

“Okay kids, get in your seats, we have a very special surprise today because today we got all the responses from your pen pals! So I’m going to pass out all the letters we got back and I want you all to take about 5 minutes to quietly read your letters and then we’re going to discuss how it’s going so far!

“Jacob, here’s yours… Britney, this must be for you… Casey, here ya go… Robert…”

“Alright, now go ahead and take a few minutes to open your letters… if you need any help opening them, let me know, try not to rip the letter inside…”

Casey opens his envelope, takes out the letter, unfolds it and begins to read…

“Mr Casey… I am Abdul for Iran. Thanks you for writing me even if I am fucking hate America.”

Casey pauses and looks around the classroom… after a few seconds he continues to read…

“You talk on about America being great and what fuck do I care. Iran is shit but I never will live or come to America. Iran is home for me. America tries to fuck my home and shit on my home. I family hopes to America die. But you are nice, Casey. I am loving swimming too! Here in Iran we swim in Caspien Sea and am loving it. When the sun is shines and me father takes to swim, I am loving it.

But I do not swim much because Iran life is to busy. I should tell you Casey that I am thief in Iran. I fucking America tourists. America tourists are fat and are stupid and are easy to thief. To fuck the tourists I use knife and I have by accident put knife in man and cut him. I cry for many long time after but it is okay because I make money. And who cares shit about fat American? Not I. I love to follow American tourist and take his money. It is so fun!

Casey, I am happy to write you! I hope you write to me back and one day visit me in my home and swimming with me in Caspien Sea! Please write back!

Abdul”

Casey stares at the letter for several minutes…

TO BE CONTINUED…

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One Response to “PENPALS WITH IRAN!”

  1. Oh, man! That’s awesome… you should make this a series.

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